As mothers, we tend to put a lot of pressure on ourselves. Some even question whether they are good mothers or not. It’s important to keep in mind that raising children is not always smooth sailing. We are unable to predict or control everything. Whether you want it or not, a difficult problem may arise and affect our life.
We may tend to criticize ourselves and question whether we do something wrong. Unfortunately, many external factors come from our closest confidantes who rather give us the support we need, they make us feel even worse. In the end, we blame ourselves and feel apologetic for what we did. If you want to be a good mom, stop doing this. Read on to find all the things that a mom should never apologize for!
Needing A Break
This is most likely the main thing that we will feel bad about when we encounter this feeling. Guilt may arise when you start feeling tired and want to have a break without having your kids around. But that’s okay. It is only normal, and almost every mother feels it too from time to time. It does not mean that you did not love your child, it just means that you need time to relax and just be with yourself. Everyone needs their me-time, this is especially so for mothers who can’t seem to catch a break each day.
You can talk about it to your partner, and express what you feel. Your partner can not read your mind, so don’t expect him to know what you need if you did not communicate it. Because he cannot read your mind, let your partner know what you need. You have the right to a break.
Parenting Style
It is not rare to see other people criticize someone else’s parenting style, or be quick to blame if they did not think that your parenting style is good enough.
While some advice could be useful, being a mother is a process. You will learn how to do it along the way. When it comes to your child, it’s crucial to trust your intuition. Since no babies are alike, understanding your child and what is best for them is more crucial than listening to advice from others who think they know more than you.
Breastfeeding In Public
Even with a newborn, there are times when you just want to leave the house. When you’re out, you need to breastfeed the baby if they’re crying. You have the right to do that! What your child needs transcends what other people think. Once you stop worrying about what other people think, everything will get simpler. Don’t think too much, the majority of people won’t even be aware that you are nursing.
You Or The House Is A Mess
There are so many things that you need to do as a mom. If someone comes to visit and you haven’t finished cleaning the house, then that’s okay. If there are toys scattered on the floor or unwashed dishes in the kitchen, you are not suddenly becoming a bad mother. Don’t be hard on yourself if you don’t have the time or energy to clean everything up because taking care of your child is a full-time job. Your child will undoubtedly make a new mess in a few minutes even if you do clean up. Therefore, there is no need for you to be sorry about it.
On top of that, it is also okay if you don’t look as good. Being a mom is exhausting. Don’t feel bad about wearing torn clothes or still having a tummy. Nobody expects you to look a certain way. Nobody has the right to comment on your look, regardless of whether your hair is unkempt or you consistently wear the same clothes.
Not Letting Everyone Hold The Baby
It seems like everyone wants to hold a newborn when they just arrived. Sometimes you don’t think that it’s comfortable or safe enough for the baby. After all, a newborn baby is still very sensitive. That’s okay if you ask them not to do that. Not everybody has a right to touch your baby just because you have one.
Acknowledging Your Feeling
Having a child will cause feelings that you didn’t even realize you possessed, to come to the surface. You will cry, become too sensitive, or question yourself. Both devouring love and frustration might arise and it might confuse you. But that’s okay, you can express your emotions whenever you need to and you do not have to apologize for it.
Asking For Help
When you’re a mother, you feel under so much pressure to accomplish everything. This is even more so if you’re a stay-at-home mother. Thus why sometimes when you feel too overwhelmed you might want to get extra help to make it easier for you to manage the household. That’s okay if you want to hire a part time maid to help clean out your house. Never feel bad about asking for assistance when you need it, no one has the right to judge you for that.
Remember that this list is not all-inclusive. There may be other things that happen that you feel compelled to apologize for or be sorry about. Two things to remember for all moms out there, don’t judge yourself too hard and be compassionate with yourself!
